Two Truths and a Lie: ‘IT Stories’ Edition Part 2

If you missed the Interchange IT Podcast’s first round of Two Truths and a Lie, you can catch it here. We had so much fun trying to figure out which of the three #ITStories was fake in each round, we thought we’d make a part two.

Answers are at the bottom, so keep track of which one in each set you think is fake news. Have fun!

Round 1: Flat tire, a budding artist, and a dishwasher mishap

  1. I once had someone come into the office and ask me to fix their flat tire. This isn’t what IT does, but I fixed it anyway.
  2. We had a user who was having issues with his desk phone. We were trying to verify the make and model, so we asked for a picture of his desk phone. We soon got a scanned image of a hand-drawn picture of his desk phone complete with a key describing all the hotkeys they set.
  3. While working at the Geek Squad, I had a customer come in with a laptop that she wanted fixed. It was dripping water out of it at the time she brought it in. I found out she had washed it in the dishwasher because she spilled a pot of coffee on it and didn’t know how else to get the coffee out.

Round 2: A throwing knife, an oil spill, and Christmas spirit

  1. I had a user throw a throwing knife through a laptop screen while practicing at home and tried to sell us on the story that he dropped it on accident.
  2. A user complained that their laptop was no longer working. When looking into the laptop, I noticed it smelt amazing. I found some liquid damage and asked what happened, she said there was a small oil spill. It turns out she spilled her essential oils on the keyboard.
  3. Back in the day I worked for a computer repair shop. One day shortly after Christmas, a customer came in carrying her new computer monitor but instead of waiting in the repair line, she cut to the front and began yelling about “this no good piece of crap” we sold her. I figured it would be best for all the customers to deal with her immediately, so I ask what was wrong. No sound plays. I see that her monitor has side mounted speakers and that the cord for them is still bundled with a twist tie. I ask if she plugged the speakers in and of course she had not. “I shouldn’t have to plug in so many wires for this computer thing to work”

Round 3: Shots fired, patch management, and health-conscious users

  1. I was working IT at a mortgage company and was called in to fix a problem on the firm’s computer server. When I got into the server room, I was surprised to see my manager being escorted out of the room by the police, covered in puke. There were bullet holes all over the server. It turns out my manager got angry one night, got drunk in the office, grabbed the gun from his desk, and opened fire on the server, destroying $100,000 worth of equipment. He proceeded to throw up, wet himself, and pass out in the room.
  2. Once I was asked to look at my fellow IT team-member’s computer. He said it kept flashing a blue screen. I looked into it and said it looked like the computer hadn’t been patched in 6 months. This is bad enough, but what makes it worse is he was over patch management for the company…
  3. Just yesterday, we got a request asking for more gluten-free options stocked in the office kitchen. #FacePalm

Round 4: Overzealous with scissors, virus small-talk, and minor water damage

  1. One of our old temp hires was overly cautious about everything she did. One day, I was walking back from changing another user’s wireless mouse battery when this user comes up to me. “Help, I think I’ve infected the network with a virus!” When I arrived, I saw that she had CUT the Ethernet cable coming out of the wall because she didn’t know what to do. The virus ended up being an ad on a website, so after replacing the cable, I took away the scissors.
  2. I was in the elevator with one of my co-workers and we were making small talk. When he found out I was in IT, he said “I just saw that CDC Virus Report. Ransomware is just getting crazy these days. No escape. Keep fighting the good fight” and he walked out of the elevator.  I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the CDC report was referring to the flu virus.
  3. A user came up to me in the hallway with what looked like a piece of garbage. Turns out it was the user’s phone that had been recovered from the bottom of the lake. He asked “Can you get my photos off this??”

Round 5: A Tinder fail, a computer science degree, and a buggy computer

  1. I was on Tinder (don’t judge me), where my description says my job (IT Manager) and my age. I matched with a really pretty girl, who I talked back and forth to for a few days. She asked me a question about her broken laptop and I saw this as a perfect opportunity to meet up and show off. We met up at a coffee place and I fixed her laptop. I messaged her that night asking her out again, but I never heard from her again. She definitely just wanted her laptop fixed.   
  2. The other day, a user called me because their desktop would not turn on. I called them and went over the standard power questions: Is it plugged in? Is the purge protector on? Etc. The user responded yes to everything so I get a bit more technical in the questions. The user stops me and says “I have a computer science degree and have been working with computers for over 20 years. The problem is the computer.” As a last effort, I ask if they’ve pressed the power button on the front of the tower. The line goes silent except for the sounds of the computer starting up.
  3. Had a laptop come in with a weird smell. User turned it on and it began smoking. I opened it up to find a roach nest inside. IT just bought her a new laptop and we never spoke of it again.

Round 6: An ex-husbands advice, a magical charging cable, and a different kind of patch job

  1. One customer called stating her keyboard stopped responding. I asked when it last worked. She said it worked right before she washed it. I asked how did she wash it and what made her decide to do that. She said she put it in the dishwasher because her ex-husband said that’s how you clean a keyboard. I proceeded to explain that was not correct, and she should probably stop taking advice from her ex-husband
  2. I was asked to go and look into a problem a user was having with his laptop. I looked at it and realized that he had forced the charging cable into the Ethernet port, and now it was stuck. I asked him why he kept forcing the cable in when it obviously didn’t fit, and he insisted that he’s always plugged it in this way and it usually works.
  3. I once had a user submit a ticket asking me to fix a hole in the bathroom wall

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